How to Be a Relaxed Girl in Curly World | STACIE SAYS

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

How to Be a Relaxed Girl in Curly World




Yes, I still use relaxers and though I love my natural sistahs, really I do, I'm not ready to make the commitment to wearing natural hair.
I don't have the time nor the energy that I know I would need for maintaining natural hair. I'm also aware of all the reasons natural hair can be better for you, like being chemical free. The fact is you can still have healthy relaxed hair.


Tips for Women with Relaxed Hair 

*Wash and condition your hair weekly, this really goes without saying.

*Use products I know I try a lot of different beauty products but your hair is happier when the products are more natural. My favorites right now are Carol's Daughter and Shea Moisture

*Get your hair trimmed or at least do it yourself, if you must.

*Try to stretch your relaxer as long as you can if you hair type will allow it. Mine won't allow more than 10 weeks before it starts to break off, so be careful with this.

*Don't let the relaxer cook more than the directions say. Back in the day, I would leave it on because the longer the straighter. Don't judge, you know you did it too. Now, I know better.

*Don't put heat on your hair more than once a week. I have one day that I will apply heat to my hair and that's after I wash it. After that, that's it. No more heat until wash day.

Related post: Getting Rid of Bad Hair Products

Real Talk

Don't let your peers pressure you into doing something you can't commit to. I used to go back and forth about going natural. Heck, I still do. Especially after looking on Instagram or watching YouTube. I'd be all ready for a big chop and then reality would set in. Girl, you know you ain't ready for this! Never make any huge transition for your hair or anything else in life without at least sleeping on it. Many of mornings I have woke up like yeah, I'm not ready.

You know your hair. Sometimes we get lost in all of the YouTube hype and wonder why our hair didn't turn out like Star 87's or whoever's hair. We may have similar hair types but no one has your exact hair. Just as your skin and face are unique. You weren't created the same as any other and God knows every single one of those hairs on your head, no matter how stubborn they are.

Related post: My Hair Journey


Bottom line?

I'm not pro relaxer, I'm pro you. Whatever makes you happy sis, do that! 

The truth is, one day I will probably go natural, but today is not that day. Maybe when I'm old and grey, but for now, I'm happy being me!


Are you a natural or relaxed girl? What has your hair experience been like?
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27 comments

  1. Yes, love the pro you! You better work! LOL :)

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  2. I still relax! I was natural but after having my son I didn't have the energy to keep up with it.

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    1. I hear ya! I believe every woman should do what works best for her.

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  3. I really like this post. I still relax my hair and have no plans of going natural any time soon. I appreciate hair tips for my relaxed hair.

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    1. Thank you! It's refreshing to see that I'm not the only one still relaxing my hair.

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  4. I love my natural hair but I will be the first to admit it is a LOT of work! I totally understand sticking with relaxers. I have 4 sisters and I was the last to take the plunge. I definitely think you should stick with what works for you.

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    1. Thank you Camile! It does take a lot of work. I was natural as a teen so I know how it is.

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  5. I have never relaxed my hair. Most of the time my hair is just natural with a wavy curl and if I decide to straighten then I take out the handy dandy blow dryer.

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    1. Girl, I wish! I have a very tight wavy hair pattern that won't let me wear it straight at all. I would have to only style it curly and I want the variety.

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  6. Welp, I'm an all natural gal. I used relaxer from about 1988 to 1996. I started growing my hair out and got tired of the in between so I did a semi big chop. Nowadays, with the quality and amount of products available you don't have to do the big chop - yup it's possible to grow your hair out for quite a bit without worrying about cutting it. Also, if you have a good natural haircare provider it can be easy.

    I had dreadlocks from 1996/7 until 2007, wore my hair out and natural until 2013 when I started locs again. Unfortunately lost my hair due to the treatment so now I'm trying to see how long I can last with curly, natural hair before I lock again!

    Yea, do you is a good choice for most things. ;-)

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    1. Love my natural sistahs! I loved your dreads, they were very pretty. But your new look is cute too. It's flattering on you.

      Yes girl, do you! You already know I'm gonna do me! ;)

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  7. Hey Stacie!
    Good topic of discussion! I never thought I'd go natural, but I did. I've been all natural for about 4 years now. I decided because the move "Good Hair" really got me to thinking about chemicals etc. Anywho....I didn't do the big chop-that was a crazy concept to me! LOL! So I started to wear weaves, and that's how I grew my hair out over the years. In between weaves I would get deep conditioning treatments and trims. So I'm really happy with my hair now length etc. The only issue is it very difficult to maintain, because I like it straight. And now I work out! So girl, the roots be like.....wow! LOL! I will probably go back into a weave this winter, just to protect it again and help with the work out issue. But ultimately, I am happy with my decision. I can say, it's not for everyone!

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    1. Dee, I had no idea your hair was natural. I love it! I think a big chop would be traumatic for my since I did that as a young girl. But I'm like you, I would want to wear my hair straight and because my hair is natural very wavy, it would be very difficult to maintain. But you give me hope sis!

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  8. I am a natural girl, but I agree, it depends on the person. Natural hair is A LOT of work, so I do miss the easier days of relaxed hair sometimes, lol. What's keeping me natural is I know it's a lot healthier for my hair.

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    1. Kasi, you natural hair is gorgeous! I love how full it looks. Whatever you're doing is working girl!

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  9. Love that you are rocking your hair in a way that makes you happy. I have been natural for about 14 years so this is what easy for me. At the end of the day it really is just hair.

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    1. I love that you've been natural so long. That's awesome! And you're right, it is just hair. I heard someone say that and it made all the difference for me.

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  10. Hair styles are as personal as the individual and we should love our hair. Been visiting your blog and I like what I have read, so I will be back for more.

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  11. I'm a girl who was relaxed but now I'm natural. I think a lot of naturals quickly forget they were relaxing their hair not that long ago, so no need to throw shade at the ladies who still relax their hair. For me personally, I've found a regimen that isn't more complicated or time consuming that when I was relaxed besides a little extra time detangling. KISS: Keep It Super Simple!

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  12. I haven't had a relaxer since the 90s. I've been rocking my natural curls for a couple of years now. I flat iron it every now and then. My mom was totally not on board with being a naturalista. She recently called me to say she chopped all the relaxer out of her hair. BIGGEST. SHOCK. EVER. :)

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  13. I agree with this post 100%. I don't think there's anything wrong with natural or relaxed hair. It's a matter of preference, and what you're willing to commit to.

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  14. This is timely. I, too, am still relaxing my hair. I have friends and family who have gone natural. I'm not ready. I'm not committed enough to the work and energy like you said. It's hard because sometimes I do feel that people are judging me for getting my hair relaxed.

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  15. I totally agree. I prefer my natural hair, but I had healthy, long relaxed hair. I just chose to be relaxer free because it's more cost effective. It's what YOU want

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  16. I love my natural sistas as well but I still relax my hair. I don't relax often because I wear extensions. I agree that its a matter of preference between natural and relaxed hair.

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  17. I love this. Do you and what makes you happy. It has to be what you want and what you love!

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  18. I am a naturalista but I have my days when I want to slap that creamy crack in my hair and get it over with. The bad hair day struggle is real! Sometimes, I miss my relaxed hair but I also love how thick and lively my natural hair is. I have a relaxer kit in my hallway closet just in case one day I can't take it anymore 😂

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